Bohemian Wellspring

After a wonderful week at Grandma’s house, I came home to have a wonderful bout of digestive issues.

So, day two of the training was also great. The problem is that early on in the day I started to realize I was having the same tummy troubles I’ve had on occaison. I really think it might be food intolerances. Wheat possibly, lactose definitely. So, I’ll have to keep an eye on them. I should really start a food log so I know what is causing problems. The thing is, it only happens once in a great while. So, there isn’t a very good opportunity for me to observe a pattern. But, we will see.

Anyway, Jessie and I ended up heading to the Lake Tavern which I have to say is a definite “gathering place” as it were. I’m planning on heading to the tavern again a few times to see if I can’t gather a bit more information.

I also need to get on the website and register for the forum they set up for us. I have just been feeling so shitty…

And despite feelings of shittiness I have managed to get my cleaning done again! WoOHoO! However, I did let the clean laundry pile up, and also the downstairs is quite disasteriffic. But, everything upstairs is done, and tommorow is a downstairs day. So I did as much as I did cleaning wise as I did last week, but I also hit a few detail spots. I cleaned up the entertainment center really well in the bedroom, and cleaned up the vanity area and the window in the bathroom. Oh yes… and the bed, which I determined needed its own little trashcan after having picked up Ryans side of it.

Now I suppose I ought to go get some sleep so I can rise and shine in the morning and get stuff done!

Yesterday sucked a bunch.

Grandma couldn’t bear weight on her right knee, so we had to take her to the hospital. Turns out she has no cartilage at all in her knee. So she is bed ridden until we talk to the doctor about what her options are and decide what she is going to do. But, if she can’t stand up, we can’t care for her here. If we try to lift all of her weight without her using both of her legs, then we are going to get hurt.

So, I got to sit in a room while my mom and aunt berated each other and my grandmother.  All the  while my grandmother is in total denial, and begging to talk to her Christian Science healer  who prays for her for $400  a phone call, and won’t pray  anymore if she goes to a doctor.  She  ended up talking to her twice, and kept begging to call a third time, to tell her the same thing she already said. My aunt kept relating the information given to her incorrectly which was pretty annoying. She interprets things her own way and then that is of course the only thing that is important. She kept telling grandma that it wasn’t fair for her to put her health in our hands, and if she fell we would be liable for her injuring herself worse. My mom was sitting there ranting about how she had just gotten old and that was all and she wouldn’t be able to walk anymore. She would be bedridden, and she would have to be rolled all the time to prevent bedsores.

My point was just that we were not equipped to take care of her if she can’t stand up. So A: we need to be sure she isn’t injured, and trying to make her stand is making it worse. And B: We need to reassess how we are going to take care of her, and even if it is a temporary issue – it might be a good idea to take her somewhere where they can either tell us the best way to handle the situation, or take care of her until we can get whatever we need to be able to care for her properly, or until she can bear weight again.

Janet was flip flopping back and forth between whether or not we should take her that night, and I was like ok… well how are we going to get her into bed…. how is she going to go to the bathroom? Ugh…

So yeah…. hospital was fun. The EMT gave me retarded directions. He told me to go the the Providence Place Mall, and then make a series of turns which involved no landmarks, and no street names. I should have looked it up on the computer before I left. I remembered seeing some hospital signs in the area, so I figured I could find it by following those signs. What he SHOULD have told me was to go the state house, and then just go straight until I see the signs. I ended up going into Whole Foods to see if they had WiFi I could use because I wanted to be able to look at the map since I was a little stressed and having trouble retaining abstract thought. The nice girl at customer service lives near it, so she gave me directions which were still strange to follow, but I made it anyway.

I ranted to Jessie about my lovely night for about 40 minutes and various text messages. By the time I got home I still had the fight or flight adrenaline rushing, and a massive headache, and I figured I would blog till I felt better, but once gram was in bed, and my mom left I was pretty exhausted.

Gram got up at 5:30 to go to the bathroom, and I had to explain to her again that she was not to get out of bed… she didn’t remember. She remembered going to the hospital at least – but nothing of the outcome I guess. So, I got to change her diaper. Not the worst thing I have ever had to do in my life, but really – nothing says good morning like a big warm mass of urine soaked cotton and wrapped in plastic.

I went back to bed, but didn’t really sleep – just dozed. Its such a lovely lazy rainy day, but I’m sure it going to be a fun day of auntie, and mommy trying to figure out if they should take gram to the hospital in the rain. And if she does end up having major knee surgery, she is going to end up in a nursing home again for rehabilitation. And really what do you do with a knee that has no cartilage… there is no padding, nothing to allow the bones to move across one another. I’m guessing either a knee replacement, or you have to put in some artificial pad to replace the cartilage.

Ok… I’m about done with this topic.

Time to make some breakfast, and do my cleaning, and then come up with some good recipes to try next week.

I’m trying to convince Rene to put a band-aid on his big toe, because he stubbed it and broke off his toe-nail really short. Seeing as he likes to run around like a psycho most of the day, he has continued to stub it. So, when I told him we should put a band aid on it, his response was “No mommy, your decision doesn’t work.”

We’ll see who’s decision wins out.

So, I’m on my “lunch break” from cleaning the house. I had an egg salad sandwich. I have already cleaned out the downstairs bathroom/laundry room. Luckily I had just cleaned the living room last week so it’s not as huge a disaster as it could be. But, I need to also  clean out  the fridge and plan my meals for next week.

At some point today…. I’m guessing in the next couple of hours, Yoda and I are going to go pick apples at Palazzi’s Orchard with all the kids. Should be a crazy cool time. I guess afterwards we will probably also have dinner. Not sure what that will be though, but I bet I’ll get some ideas while I’m cleaning out the fridge 🙂

Alright… back to the cleaning….I’m hoping that with practice this will become a more streamlined process.

I found this amazing video on YouTube in a very strange way. I got a reply to a comment that I posted – only I never posted a comment. I’m guessing that I was signed in to You Tube at my mom’s house or something, and then one of my brothers commented on the video under my name by accident. But hey… thats cool with me 🙂 So, without further ado, check out Andy McKee and his amazing guitar skills. On a side note, my computer speaker stopped buzzing…. odd, but welcome.

I got up a bit late today, but I’m going to say I needed it. And besides… late only means 8am. I had already set my alarm for 6 instead of 5, but I guess I was so tired I didn’t even hear it till ten of 8. Rene did wake me up again last night, because he got up to go to the bathroom. But, the cool part is he actually went to the bathroom this time, and decided he wanted to get snuggly in mommy’s bed. So, we are making progress.

Today’s mission is to clean upstairs. The whole upstairs (except for the abyss that is Ryans old room – thats all his stuff so I’m not going to pretend to know what to do with it.) So priority wise, Im going to say bathroom, then master bedroom, then office – although chances are I won’t really make it out of the bedroom. So long as I make it better than it is now, and keep doing that each week it will get to the point I would like it to be at.

Alright.. time to tackle my monday….

Right now I am pleasantly exhausted. I feel like I had just about the perfect day. I got up when I wanted to, made everyone breakfast, got some housework done – almost to the extent I wanted to. Granted I was hoping to essentially gather every stray item of clothing in the house and wash/sort/get rid of whatever required it. I suppose that was more than a little ambitious. Especially for a weekend day where everyone is free to hang out, because of COURSE I’m going to be doing something.

And that something was going to the International Day of Peace at Rotary Park in Putnam. It was a pretty good time. Very hot until the shade finally appeared in front of the stage. But otherwise fun. There was good music, especially Echo Uganda. I wish they could have played longer, but oh well. The best part is that half of the members work at the Co-Op, so I know where to find them 🙂 I think along with our communal dinners that we have been thinking about having, we should also plan on some music playing after the fact. I miss having our singing/guitar playing around the campfire. Or, maybe I could convince my brothers to come up like on weekend a month or something and we could play for fun. I need a few hippie drums. I actually was thinking it would be a fun project to try and invent my own musical instruments. I also had this idea that it would be really cool to create sculptures that played music when the wind blew through them, or the rain fell on them. You know… put them out in the garden, and get some interesting background music with the changes of the weather.

I’m feeling underhydrated, so I’m drinking water from a pyrex 4 cup measuring cup. I mean really… I should just drink two of those a day… then I would get my 8 glasses 🙂

Lets see… other thoughts for the day. Oh yeah…. Casa Mariachi… wow. REALLY good mexican food. And cheap, and CLOSE! Which is of course the most shocking part. I really hope they last, because we were all really impressed. Even Rene liked his few bites of macaroni and cheese. At least he will like it tomorrow when he eats it for lunch…

Reflecting on the International Day of Peace:

I definitely did not have peace in my life when I was a child. My mom is way too high strung, and my dad was just at a loss as to how to deal with her. And then after that I went from one conflict ridden relationship to the next. But now I really do have such a peaceful existence compared to then. Since moving in with Ryan I have become so much more of the person I had wanted to be, and its all because I was supported, and because I didn’t have to waste energy on petty conflicts.

I guess its the whole Hierarchy of Needs….

If you can’t get your basic need for safety (in some cases, safe emotional space) then you can’t grow beyond that point.

It is very unfortunate how many people don’t have that need met and are stuck in perpetual struggle, unable to go beyond that point and find out what more there is to life.

Today I am tired. Oh yes.. sleepy sleepy.

I got up super early yesterday, and managed to go to bed nice and early last night. I want to say it was about 9, or 9:30. Then I got up this morning at ten of 5 because Rene peed his pants, and woke me up to let me know. So, I managed to put him back to bed (luckily he had gotten out of bed first before he peed his pants.) And then I climbed back into bed for a couple of hours for some “quality time” with Ryan. After we took a shower I decided to make us all breakfast which was really good. I made scrambled eggs with some parmesan cheese and thyme, pepper, and dill mixed in. And we also had pancakes and some rosemary, garlic and olive oil potatoes. Very very tasty. But now… my brain has realized that I got up far earlier than usual and thinks I’m crazy.

So, my goal today is to get the laundry under control. If I can accomplish that today I will be happy, and being horribly exhausted at the moment will be worth it.

Im considering an esspresso. But. I try not to rely on caffeine . Ugh…. I need to get up and dance around now or something.